To My Immortal Beloved

Years have passed and yet I still grieve for you; for us. Time and Chance happeneth not to us-for we parted like dew in early morn sunrise. Too young, too beautiful to die young.
In our youth how circumstance torn us. My heart weeps whenever I think of you, my life, my fire, my other half.
Endless nights of sighing-full of woeing. I whisper your name in many of my dreams.
I recall the time when death conjured us. Tykes we were chanced upon to meet-A bier layed before us as we first saw each other.
And like many, it also haunted us. But oh! So soon. So soon.
If I only knew, you disapproved your marriage. You knew you never could've loved him. But you said nothing of the matter. You only glanced at me-a deep silent concern I read from your eyes-they troubled me.
If I only knew of your ailment which you concealed from me. You reasoned you were not worthy of my love. It riddled me my whole life why and how unworthy you were for me. If I only knew, how deep you really loved me-which you tried to disdain even until your deathbed.
Your last correspondence proved your profound hidden feelings. Was it too late, my beloved. Much too late to repair and redeem. You were bound to another man and to your firstborn.
However, you wished to be with me. In your silence, you wished to be with me. Was it too late, much too late.
How I dearly loved you. I dreamt all my life to be with you. But somehow Fate permitted us not to.
If I can only turn Time. If I only can. I would tell you how much I really dearly loved you from the very night we stood in front of the bier. But I can only wish...
Now my life, my fire-the flame you gave me now lies in cinders. I walk alone in this world a corpse, cold and wanting. To want the warmth of your touch, to caress your poignant face, to refresh my thirst for love and intoxication. All is lost...How now my beloved immortal? How now?
In Memoriam-Aya